Wednesday, 2 February 2011. 12:25 am


Why wait for 11:11? Wishes don't always come true, so don't waste your time wishing for this and that. Why lie? The truth hurts but lie does much more. Why cry over someone? You're just too naive. Why pretend? You're in a loss, you don't want people around you to ask you questions. Why hide the pains? It just proves you're weak, you're afraid to face your true feelings. Why smile? You're pretending to be strong. 

So, if you just want to be friends.. Ok, I'll pretend I'm not madly in love with you. If you found someone new? Ok, I'll pretend I'm happy for you and give all my best wishes to you guys. If you want me back? Ok, pick me up because i fell and make all my emotions come back to me. I hate to be emotionless, to smile when i don't feel any happiness, to force myself cry when I can't cry out for no reasons.






Hi my readers, rlly rlly sorry for the delay of my blogpost!!! :( Right now, i have around 400 pixs in my com waiting to be uploaded to blog -___- *faints... I'm srsly getting lazy to blog nowadays, SIGH. Nevertheless, i will try to blog more this few days! Because i've gotten the pixs ready and organised <: HEHE.









So, cny's round the corner already yah! Just two more days, WOOOHOOO. I'll have my redpackets! ^^ Happy max. I kinda have enjoyed my days recently as i have all my bbgs to spent thier weekends with me etc~ Recalling time~~~~





I think two weeks ago or something?... I met up with Gerine!!!! Like fucking long since we met each other== we've known each other for around a year yet we met up like only 3times only, fuck pathetic :( So we plan to each other! Idk what got into her that day, she was damn good k.
















First, she cabbed down my schl to wait for me. Together we cabbed down cine and catch a movie! Yes, she treated me and including our snacks! Took neoprint, yes.. she sponsored again! Mad love her k, <3. lol. Cabbed home after that.






On a random day, which I forgot when.. I was exhausted after school and went home to prepare, went down dg to meet curry and his friend. Ahgirl came down to find me aft awhile. We had LJS, camwhore etc and chat alot as we've not seen each other for quite a while. Hahahaha, i still remembered that curry was one of the guy who helped me alot when i ran away from home, excluding bbb (:










Hmm, on Saturday ahgirl and me headed down to PH. Ladies night! Memorable night hurrrrrrrrrr. Went down to Serangoon to meet ahgirl, szehui plus shane.. cabbed down to PH. Damn, i did something crazy there again. Zzzzz, end up we only got to party awhile and drinked coffee with some important ppl. Lololol! Had mac breakfast aft tht and cabbed home! Immediately toh==









How can i lose something when it's never mine? How can i hold on to something when it doesn't stays? How can i pretend to be happy when i feel nothing at all? How can i even be replaced if i was in your heart all along?..




How about life this few days? Ups and downs actually, on my rollercoaster. Just a rough summary of it. Basically i've been going out with my bbgs! Went for drinking session with them, took neoprints, cine etc. Ohhhhhh, i've been late for schl everyday... it gets from bad to worst! damn.




From being late for 5mins, became 40mins, 3hours... -___- The 3 hours one was t o t a l l y not my fault k!!!! I still wokeup at 5am to get prepared etc! Cloud that fellow was super duper great on that day and came down to my hse, fetch me to schl w/o any complains .______. Super rare hur. Took bus down, dozed off.. the trip was fucking 2hours! Kill me please,  i think i would have died without his shoulders. Zzzzz





Had breakfast and a super long talk before i went in for class. And oh so great, my whole class and teachers saw cloud. Great great, how everyone's asking me questions -____- was having gastric and headache, aint feeling well at all! 

Major breakdown at home in the night...... S I G H. 
 
I'm tired of  fighting, I want to be fought for. I'm tired of caring, I want to be cared for. I'm tired of being a faceless girl waiting for the next mask to be put on, I wanna be myself. I'm tired of pretending it doesn't hurt, i want you to heal me. I'm tired of being just me, I wanna be yours. I'm tired of this and that, now can i end it? I wanted a perfect ending for us. Now I've learned it through the hard way that some poems just don't rhyme, some misunderstandings just can't be explained, some breakups just can't be understood and some stories just do not have a clear beginning, middle, or even end. Just like us.

So, i didnt attend schl today and head to get mc. According to doc, my stomach is acidic! How could it be :( I've been eating alot k. And ohyea, i've grown taller and lose weight!!!! Plusplus, i've successfully say no to smoking unless im drunk or smth andand i totally switched my bodyclock, cut down on clubbing \m/ Shopped with parents at jp and as usual, emptied daddy's wallet. Bought my cosmetics and nailarts  ^^ Imma happygirl today!



K i think im very lazy to attend schl tmr also.... therefore, i wont be going. Heh, will be heading out with all my bbgs tomorrow, have my reunion dinner with all my cousins and then head out again! Photo spammmmmmmm again. I promise to update during cny!!!!!!!!!!!!! *cross fingers.


Meanwhile i need all my readers to visit my blog on regular basis alright >: CLICK MY NUFFNANGS AND COMMENTS PLS. I hope this post didnt disappoint you!

I know what its like to want to die; how it hurts to pretend it doesn't hurt; how you try to fit in but you can't; how you hurt yourself on the inside yet smiling on the outside; how you wear a mask that grins and lies; how you deal with life's bullshit and felt drained by it.... If any guy would and could love me like i'm the only girl in the world... how great would it be :'(


Treat it as i beg you alright, if you rlly love me... please stop doing all those things and prove it to me.. stop hurting me. If you don't love me, then please stop all your mind games with me alright... you pushed me away, pull me back as you want. You have no idea how much it hurts. Again and again, i've been questioning myself... are you really still the "you" i love? Im drained, enough of everyone. Using me for thier own advantages. I wish my roller coaster will kill me one day, really. Because i've totally no idea how much longer i can hang on.

Elene: Hey, may i ask where did you buy that pink purse of yours? :> it's very chio.
-Hi, im sorry for not being able to tell where i bought it :/

x: whats priv school ?
-A school that is like not under the MOE?

x: how old are you right now?:)
-For me to know, for you to find out:)

jea: I'm so jealous of your life :/ It seems fun without any worries haha.. anyway your private school dunnid wear schl u? :o
-Uh, actually im more jealous about ordinary girls life. My life is too complicated, that you can never imagine how miserable you'll be if you are me :/.. Its full of worries and troubles in fact. My uni= polotee+pants. LOL

gRACIAzxcs (:: Do you eat vegetables? Passerby-ed
-I sure do~

Irene: Help ni pop pop pop ni de cbox yi xia whut!
-You helping me to add burden== cos i need to reply one more tag..

gina: u use lipstick or lipgloss?(:
-Both!

pinky: which blogshop u buy ur lip gloss? mind sharing??(:
-I got my lipgloss at etude house~

passerby: the pink wallet in the picture, where did you buy it from?
-For me to know, for you to find out :) sorry.

passerby: u wat ite?
-Im not ite. LOL?

someone: hey u know huishi ? campus superstar 2009 de :)
-My previous schl senior. Why? :O

someone to passerby: she not ite lo.
-Hahaha, yup. Thanks :)

><: do you recommend shorter people to wear long pants/jeans?
-Not rlly.. i think its weird x.x however different ppl have different views.

PASSERBY:D: Heyy! May i know what schl are you from?
-Hi there, errrrr touch youth learning centre ._.

[SS]: you got ink at back somewhere there?
-Yea.

psb: I mean tis love necklace?
-F21.

m: hihi, fep sells bagpack expensive? got less than 35? ^^
-Hi there, er normally bagpack isnt cheap. Depends on the size and quality... $35 with the right size and quality.. abit hard to find?

AHLING: Mac ling you change to wad school !!
-Told you on fb!

x: can i know your lower lashes that bought at sasa , what the code ?
-552 and 553 :O

(:: i went to sasa, but the lower lashes i saw is very differently from the one you put on,:/
-I trimmed the lower lashes :)

[K]en: Hahaz, hi and bye lo. is manners ma.
-Haha, lol. k

Xiaox-passbyy: Hi..You still single not finding meh? why you break with your ex? anyway cheerup you till young!:P
-Er, yea? I dont find a point to find a boyf? Hahaha k :) thanks

Psb.: Tagged, chiobu (:
-Hi there, thanks. :)

Jasmine ; ♥: kailing kailingg! where you get gd lower lashes at? and how you paste one?! omgg this pic damn nice laaa. http://picasaweb.google.com/lh/photo/5_PkVS1KWIDPw2MbVI_PdDbjtkIMPI2t8dYryk7VQQw?feat=embedw
-Hahaha, i like that photo too! Er, got from sasa :)

passerby: http://picasaweb.google.com/lh/photo/bB3ZWgwaECBLxKXJLHIF5TbjtkIMPI2t8dYryk7VQQw?feat=embedwebsite where did you buy this headband? Mind sharing please!~
-You can get them at "talisman"! Available at jp, fep, bugis~ Sure can find!

Questioner!: Hey! May I knw where you buy your cny clothes from? Any recommendation of places? Coz I can't seem to find places with nice clothes! :):)
-Hey, i bought mine from fep!! You can try there :)

star: may i know your song playlist, all the name start with Your Star #_ is taken from whose mixpod playlist??
-I created that playlist myself.

KAILI: Hi babe, relink me at http://whispermylove.blogspot.com/ Thanks. :)
-Sure, asap alright!

x: how you get in PH ? when you're not 18 yet ? Lend ic ?
-Nope, i dont borrow ic. lol, p&c?

{P}: hi.
-Hi there!

zy: hi mz ~
-You are ._.

Irene: eh bby i want help you reply x lei~~
-Ni yao reply semo sia ._.?

Wenxin: Hello kailing , do you mind relinking me? :D Thanks a lot !
-Asap!

rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr: eh, u hw old uhh
-For me to know, for you to find out! :)

Dorcas: Hello! ^^v passed by:) Stay pretty, heheh:x
-Hello! Thanks alot sweetie.

sjk: whr u buy no degree coloured contact lens? if is online can give website? or give th place if bought outside. thks (:
-Errr.. i lost the links :O You can easily find those blogshops online selling lens.

Jacia: Hai lingling ^^
-Hai my ciacia!

xinxin: hihi i love ur blog(: which lens u wearing? mind saying?<:
-Hi there, thankiew. Er which pair are you saying...?